Parents of intact sons
Why, as a parent, did you decide to keep your son(s) intact? Please leave feed back for others in the comment section...
11/29/2011 10:23:08 pm
I was not sure about this when I was pregnant. Every man I have been with was cut. I might have considered it if my husband had though it was a good idea, but luckily he questioned it too, and so we did a whole lot of research and came to the logical conclusion that it is not okay to strap down a helpless child and cut apart his penis. In any other context, it would be a chargeable offense. But because a "doctor" is doing it and "caring parents" believe it is acceptable, the practice continues. Circumcision of minors is disgusting and abusive. It has no place in a civilized and caring society. I am totally fine with adults modifying their own bodies when they are old enough to decide for themselves if they want this. My daughter is 8, my son is 5, both are intact and neither have had any "issues". After finally getting used to the look of a normal intact penis my son has, it seems all the more horrible to me that this abuse continues, and I am becoming sad that my own/my husbands sex-life has been impacted permanently by this ignorance. My husband's father recently apologized for cutting him, saying that they just didn't question it back forty years ago. I think we all haev a resposibility as parents to make informed choices, which doesnt usually seem the case when people choose to cut they do it for very weird reasons, like "I think its just gross" or "its too hard to clean" . We've never done anyhting special to clean either our daughters or sons genitals, they just take regular baths. I've become very angry and "an extremist activist " as one friend recently called me for speaking up about this. to me, what seems extreme is to condone as a society cutting apart another non-consenting humans private parts.
11/29/2011 10:56:17 pm
My husband and I never really though about circumcision before becoming pregnant. I had seen and been with intact men before but never gave it much thought. Before we even knew we had a boy I knew I couldn't let anyone hurt him like that no matter what benefits it was purported to have. My husband has some of the side effects of a too tight circ(hair on the shaft, slight curvature, etc) and has always been very self conscious about it. We just agreed that we never wanted our son to experience the pain of the cut and the embarrassment of the after effects. Since giving birth and holding my son and just can't imagine why anyone would allow this to be done to a child.
11/29/2011 11:01:39 pm
It's his body and should be his choice as to whether or not his genitals are modified beyond their natural state. Plus, I couldn't imagine putting my sweet boy through that kind of pain right for no reason. I still can't.
11/30/2011 12:11:10 am
When I was pregnant with our first child in 1987, we had a certified nurse-midwife from England. She asked if we were thinking about circumcising our baby if it was a boy, and we hadn't made a decision. She said, "Don't do it! It's barbaric! Boys in England aren't circumcised, and they're fine." Then later we got information on circumcision in our Bradley prepared childbirth class, and we talked about the human rights and ethical angles of circumcision. We saw no reason to do it and plenty of reasons NOT to, so our son remained intact. Our second son also is intact. He came into the family by adoption and his birthmother left him whole, for which I am grateful. Both our sons are happy to have everything they were born with.
If I had a son years ago back when I lived in my little town in NY where every guy I knew was circ'ed, he probably would have been too. I always thought it was 'just what you do'. Then I met my husband who is happily intact and never had any issues. It was also the first time that I was actually able to 'enjoy sex' (TMI I know) but that tid bit is significant. I always thought something was wrong with me. Now I know it is because a circ'ed man lacks that extra 'gliding action' that the foreskin offers. For me, sex with a circ'ed man was painful.. not enjoyable at all. I honestly didn't feel strongly one way or another when he was born other than knowing that I wouldn't be having it done. At the first ped appt. he asked if we were having him circ'ed. I told him 'no', and he said "good, there is no medical reason to have it done." Wow! I had never heard that from a medical professional before! A few months later I met a woman that I was donating my breastmilk too, as I have an oversupply, for her to feed her daughter and she was very strongly against it. I started reading some of the articles she posted on her page, and I was just enraged! How could people do this to babies? Why wasn't the medical community telling the truth? Thus led me to be the intactivist I am today!
11/30/2011 12:38:49 am
11/30/2011 01:13:06 am
When I was pregnant with my first son, I was going to be a single mom. I didn't know the gender of my child. My mom asked my one day if I would circumcise if I were having a boy. I said I didn't know, I hadn't much thought about it. She was very adamantly like, "Cate, don't. There's no reason to cut a baby's body." She pointed out my two young nephews were intact, too. (I hadn't known; it hadn't been a big deal.) So my son was born peacefully into this world and left whole.
11/30/2011 01:36:05 am
When I was pregnant with my Son I really wanted a Homebirth. The more I read about the topics of delivering a child gently into the World the more I wanted to see what else could be done to keep the experience as gentle as possible.. we researched everything we could on the subject of childbirth and infant care.
11/30/2011 05:01:07 am
When I was pregnant with my oldest (now a 15 year old), I never considered circumcision a decision to make. If she was a boy, she would have been circumcised, it's how it was in my family, it's what everyone did, and when I asked my husband (who is intact) he shrugged and said it was up to me, but he figured we should do it.
11/30/2011 02:54:27 pm
Well I'm originally from Ohio but I married a military man and moved to el paso, Texas. We were already pretty far into our first pregnancy when we moved here, shortly after at 32 weeks she was born. It was crazy and hectic and scary even tho she did AMAZINGLY well. I had pre eclampsia and knew that when I decided to have another I would be at risk for the same thing happening. 5 days after her first birthday I fell pregnant unexpectedly. We were shocked and I was not ready but I knew we could do this, it'd just be hard. At 19 weeks I found out my baby girl would be having a baby brother! We were excited! Circumcision was honestly something I NEVER even thought about. I personally don't know any man that is intact so it's just assumed to be done in Ohio. My husband was circ'd, my brother, my dad, my FIL...every male I knew. Well at 35 weeks my pre eclampsia had gotten to a point where it was too dangerous to keep going with my pregnancy, so we were off to deliver our little boy! He was born with under developed lungs and rushed to the NICU where he was intubated and given steroids. It was exciting, scary, sad...I was all over the place. I wasn't allowed to see him for 24 hours following his birth due to the magnesium I had to be on for pre e. when I finally got to see him, finally got to see that he was okay...he was breathing on his own, he nursed with no problems...he was PERFECT!! I knew I couldn't get him circ'd it was just convincing my hubby the same. About 3 weeks after he was born he had his first drs appt and I DID ask about circ. but was told if we wanted it done it would have to wait until he was older and he would be put under general antisthesia, a blessing in disguise. During the next couple weeks I was trying to figure out how to convince my husband when a friend showed me a video of the procedure, I was HORRIFIED when I saw it. So I researched for 2 days straight...every question I could imagine my husband asking and then I told him there's NO way I'm letting this happen, if our son HATES that I left the decision up to him...well blame me, I don't care. It's not my penis to decide for...and it's not yours(husbands) either! And he said "okay that's fine" I totally expected an argument but he did ask questions later on. I showed him and with showing him he discovered that "wow our intercourse problems stem from me being circ'd" yeah...amazing huh? So he told me he would try restoring but so far he hasn't done much. I really hope he does soon so that MAYBE for once in my life I can actually enjoy sex, not be in a tremendous amount of pain afterwards!
6/25/2012 06:24:26 pm
Nice blog, just wanted to say I found you through Google
11/3/2013 11:32:40 pm
WOW! These parents are THINKERS & HEROS too ! Glad to see there are still some people out there that refused to drink the Abrahamic "Kool Aid" the peddlers of evil have been pushing against innocent children...
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